"What's it like being an adult?"... answer #1
By Victoria As-it-Seams - 02:36
So mostly this blog is about sewing, but it's headed 'stitches and stories' so occasionally I stray off into other territory.
And it was a little question, that crystalised so many thoughts.
I was driving home in the gorgeous June evening with my beautiful boy. It's the best time for chatting with him, for letting go and connecting.
"I've been wondering Mummy, what's it like being an adult?" he asked.
It was a question that made me pause and think...
Well, my beautiful boy. This was the answer I might have given...
"Right now, my love, it's a bit tough being this particular adult.
"I know that for you, my lovely boy, your dad and I are your anchor. But just now I'm not feeling too solid.
"Everything has gone a bit crazy. And that's because daddy is losing his job, the work that he has done for 20 years. He's been sharing his creativity and teaching the young people from very different backgrounds, who need him most. He's been helping them to play and create music for so long.
"And now all that is ending. And we're just not sure what the future holds. It's all been so solid for so long, and now it's all a little fluid and shaky.
"Sweetheart, you know that I've been working more and more hours just to have a little bit more money, and that means I'm just so tired, and more grumpy. And I never get enough time for you, or Missy, or to sew.
"And you know, it's funny because I'm all mixed up inside. Sad, fearful and also a tiny little bit excited underneath the tiredness. Sometimes it all feels like a mountain to climb...
"So you know, maybe....being an adult is not so different from being a little boy."
Of course that's not what I said....I was lost in thought trying to answer....and driving.
It's been the hardest few months. I feel like I am 'holding' so much, my children, Mr As it Seams, my work, my unsewn sewing ideas, my teeny shabby house which never, ever has all the laundry put away.
But it's also a time to focus on the joy of my little family, to connect and support.
And we escaped to the seaside for a few days staying with dear friends who live near our favourite English secret beach.
Missy spent every minute that she could in the sea, splashing in her wetsuit. I don't think there is any purer joy than her delight at playing in the waves beneath the cliffs, where this rocky corner of England crashes into the Atlantic.
A sunset drive with my son, or a sea swim with my daughter are my anchors for my soul right now, as we all try to navigate new waters....
Posts
2 comments
I can relate so much to your post. We are in the exact same position as you are. My husband is losing his job which he had (and loved) for 17 years. And he is having a hard time dealing with it. So, life is sometimes hard for adults. I wish you, and mister as it seams all the best for the future.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry, Victoria! That's so hard. Through it all your light still shines! And these photos are beautiful, too!
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for taking the time to comment. I love hearing from you, and try to reply as often as I can, either here or by email. All views, tips, gratefully received...
Victoria